And it's Waiting on the Air
by EverybodyandTelevision
Summary: When something horrible happens to one of their own, how will Seattle Grace rally around them and find strength in each other
1. Chapter 1

Hello All! I haven't abandoned my other story just put on hold for a bit I guess. I started college and it's been incredibly hectic to say the least. This new story follows what's happened on the show but with a few changes, it takes place in season 13 except none of the Alex/Jo/DeLuca stuff went down and Leah's not back. It's dark and twisty and I hope you enjoy! Reviews and constructive criticism always welcome, thank you

Darkness and silence pair well together. Whether you find comfort or anxiety in this pair is of no importance, they still go hand in hand. It's the same feeling. Darkness engulfs your vision, silence takes over your hearing and all that's left is your thoughts. Thoughts she would quite like not to be thinking of right at this moment. Like the exact places, her bruised shoulders and hips, where her body came into contact with the cold concrete of the parking lot. She could feel the blood and the swelling but it was the other parts, the ones she couldn't feel, that she thought of most. In the distance, she thought she saw light, heard voices, but it was all too much and she let darkness and silence engulf her instead.

"Someone needs to start talking now or someone's getting fired"

Bailey started talking even as she was marching into the emergency department of her hospital. As she slowed her pace before reaching the desk where a group of her attendings were gathered, she added, "why am I only finding out about this now?".

The somber group turned to face her and April lifted her head from where it had been resting in her hands,

"We were just trying to get everything straightened out before we got more people involved than needed to be. She's a private person who… hasn't always been afforded that dignity here," April looked close to tears and Bailey softened, quieting her tone,

"I am the chief, I expect to be notified immediately when members of my staff are brought into my ER," she paused looking dejectedly toward the exam room Meredith Grey was just sidling out of, "plus I was worried. I like to think of myself as her friend and god knows she's been through enough". Bailey put a comforting hand on April's arm as Meredith reached the desk.

She looked around at the small congregation. April and Jackson were both still wearing street clothes, albeit drenched in blood and water. Karev was standing with his arms crossed a step away from the others, looking tense and fidgety. Finally, Hunt and Bailey were standing in scrubs looking disheveled and confused. She took a breath, "nothing looks surgical, she's in pretty nasty shape but it all looks superficial. Bruises, lacerations and probably a sprained wrist and a few broken ribs. I was going to take her up for X-ray and CT next, maybe get Amelia in for a consult".

April hugged her arms around herself, sighing deeply in relief, "Is she conscious?".

"She hasn't regained consciousness since we called the ambulance, her vitals are steady though so it could be any minute now," Meredith glanced around at the doctors, Karev was staring at the floor with eyes screwed shut.

"Someone please explain to me what happened this instant or I swear to god…"

"We don't know!" Jackson interrupted, a little louder than he intended. He regained his composure after the few nurses who gave him odd looks continued on their way, "We were at Joe's, all having a nice time, relaxing after our shift."

"She said she wanted to go home, that she had an early operation tomorrow. She was still sober enough to drive, we all just said goodbye and kept talking," April had picked up from Jackson, "We left the bar, oh god, it must have been at least two hours later." She lifted her hand to her mouth, tears streaming down her face once again as Jackson wrapped an arm around her. Meredith looked at Bailey, "When we got to the parking lot, we got to our cars, she was on the ground, there was blood… everywhere. We called an ambulance."

Bailey shuddered at the thought but let Meredith finish her horror story, "She woke up just as the paramedics were loading her into the back. She just grabbed my hand and and said please and just wouldn't let go. I rode with her, we got her into a room as quietly as possible." She motioned to Hunt and Karev, "These two were in the ER so they know, and a couple of nurses, but that's it."

Bailey took a deep breath, closing her eyes in the process before opening them and looking around at her mismatched crew, "ok, you and you," she said pointing to Jackson and April, "need to change, this is just scary, take showers, cool down. You," she said pointing to Meredith, "take her upstairs while, Hunt, you go find Amelia and get her up to speed. Alex," she turned around to address the surgeon still standing behind everyone, "find a room for her, far from everything, and a nurse that you trust. Can we all do that?"

Armed with plans, the surgeons of Seattle Grace dispersed and Bailey was left standing in the middle of a nearly deserted ER.

"Oh, Arizona, what happened this time?"


	2. Chapter 2

She knew before she opened her eyes that she was in a hospital bed. God she absolutely despised that feeling. Her thoughts automatically drifted to the last time she had been in a hospital bed. Her hands flew to her left leg in a panic. Or at least in her mind they did, she realised her arms felt heavy and her body felt as though a weight was pressing down on her. The sounds and smell of the hospital were getting overwhelming and she willed her eyes to open, her mouth to communicate her distress. Opening her eyes, she scanned the room. She was alone in a darkened in patient room and the door was shut, but through the blinds she could make out several attendings gathered at the desk just in the hallway. She looked down at her body, dressed in a bleak white gown and draped in a scratchy hospital blanket. Things started coming back to her

 _She was going to be so tired the next morning she thought to herself as she dug around for her car keys, taking quick strides toward her car. She couldn't help but shiver at the darkness that the burnt out streetlight gave the parking lot. She started walking a little more quickly, willing for her car to get closer. A wave of relief washed over her as her hand wrapped around the driver's door handle before she felt a swift hand on her neck and her head was hitting the frame of the car in front of her._

Arizona was jolted out of her thoughts as Meredith slid through the door. Her heart was beating out of her chest as she willed herself to calm down.

"It's just me, you still have some cuts that need stitching. I could get Jackson to come do them, but I figured you'd want the least amount of people around…" Meredith didn't make a more towards her, just stood at the door, waiting for Arizona to let her know it was ok for her to come forward. Arizona nodded slightly as she tried to readjust herself on the bed. Everything hurt. As her eyes met Meredith's again, the other doctor seemed to understand Arizona's unspoken plea, "April, Jackson and found you and I rode in the ambulance with you after you regained consciousness and grabbed my hand," Meredith was about to continue, as she set up the suture kit, before Arizona interrupted her.

"I thought… I thought we were in the woods," Meredith looked up at her, puzzled and sad, "it's all a blur but I remember grabbing your hand and thinking please let all of us get out of this hell alive". Meredith was silent as she drew Arizona's not sprained arm towards her.

Arizona looked down at her again, "it's all just bits and pieces, I can't… I can't remember what happened," tears started down her face as the reality and immenseness of what had happened hit her full on. After all the shit of the last few years, now a mugging… or an attack… or whatever the hell had just happened, she couldn't even tell, she just hurt everywhere and it was too much. She shut her eyes as the pain and sobs took over her body. Meredith stood up from the stool she'd been sitting on and slid next to Arizona on the bed, slowly so as not to scare the other surgeon. Arizona clung to her like she'd only clung to very few people before and as Meredith lay there she remembered the last time she and Arizona had shared a moment. It had been just days before Derek's death, in a supply closet and she remembered thinking just how emotional Arizona had been then. She would have laughed had the moment not been so somber; other than second hand from a beaten down and tired Callie, Meredith had never experienced an Arizona who wasn't sunny and perky. Well other than during those four days in the woods, but even then, she'd been stoic, for Mark.

As her sobs lessened, although her tears still flowed freely and her eyes remained screwed shut, Arizona registered Meredith's comforting form beside her and embarrassment took over. As she tried to disentangle herself from the other surgeon, Meredith gently rolled off the bed and back onto the stool, "you know it's not a bad thing to lose it every once in a while. I would've been more worried if you hadn't. I know we haven't been very close historically," Meredith cringed internally as she remembered seeing Arizona across the country mere weeks ago, "but we've been through our fair share of shit and I like to think I can call you my friend". She brought the sewing kit closer to her and held a hand out for Arizona's arm. Arizona looked at her, uncertain, before handing her arm over and whispering in a muted tone, "thank you".

Meredith worked silently, knowing if Arizona wanted there to be conversation, she'd initiate it, so she just put in her stitches, horizontally across the inside of Arizona's forearm through what had to be one of the most nasty and intricate cuts she had ever worked on. As she got farther along however, what was happening became clearer and clearer and Meredith tried to avoid having to address it as panic and shear horror overcame her. She glanced up to see that fortunately, Arizona was looking toward the window. As she finished stitching up the cuts, she had to keep herself from throwing something as the cruelty of what had happened hit her. Arizona seemed to take note of Meredith's change in demeanour and turned to face her and as she did, her eyes turned down to her arm.

It took mere seconds for her to start gagging, Meredith reaching an emesis basin just in time before Arizona was violently ill into. Cut into her arm, in what would most definitely leave a permanent scar, were the letters c-r-i-p-p-l-e.

Cripple.


	3. Chapter 3

"Who would do something like that? Who … what does it take … what … ", Alex couldn't finish his thought as he sat twirling his pen around, leaning back in his chair behind the nurses' desk in front of Arizona's room. Morning was just making itself known in this far flung end of the hospital where he and Meredith sat vigil. He looked over at Mer, sitting on the floor opposite him, her back against the wall.

"How long she gonna be out for?" Meredith sighed and turned her head toward the closed door, "Another couple of hours, I gave her a pretty heavy dose, she was really out of control." Meredith shook her her head, thinking of the panicking, horrified blonde in that room a few short hours ago, "Amelia cleared her, I finished stitching her up … I … I did …" She took a bath as tears threatened her, "there are no signs of sexual assault", both surgeons closed their eyes, shuddering at the mere thought.

" We're gonna have to call the police soon." Meredith looked at Alex, waiting for a response as he looked through the blinds at Arizona's small shape. He turned back, gripping the pen in his fist, " not yet, not until we at least tell her, we owe her that much."

"But they need to check her car and the parking lot and who knows where the guy is now, the more time it takes…"

"Bailey called the police," April walked in to the desk area, setting a sleeping Harriet on the counter and taking her coat off, "she said she had to, just after you sedated her, she said she'd talk to them first, they won't talk to Arizona until she's ready."

"She is not going to be happy about that," Alex winced, finally putting the pen down and standing up to stretch. April nodded and took his seat, drawing Harriet's baby carrier closer to her. They all remained like that for several moments until Meredith spoke up again, standing up herself, " Should we call Callie?"

Alex and April both whipped around to stare at her, incredulous, "NO", they both nearly yelled in her direction,

"ok, ok, I just thought, because you know, Sofia, she's going to find out anyway and she'd probably be concerned,"

"Arizona's going to want to tell her herself, on her own terms, in her own time." Alex looks at Meredith, completely confused.

"Tell Callie now and you take away all Arizona's ever looking for in life" April shook her head and both she and Alex simultaneously muttered "control" under their breaths.

Meredith realised how much she really didn't know Arizona. She guessed it was probably easier to see her through Callie's lens alone, but she had thought she was closer to her. Standing in front of the people who were arguably Arizona's Seattle family, she could see just how many more layers to the woman there were, "You guys really love her don't you?".

"It's hard not to when she cares so much about you" Alex smiled at what Arizona had done for him, pretty much given him his path and a way to fulfill it. April sighed and thought of the shoulder Arizona had given her, even as she was in a difficult part of her own life, "She doesn't expect anything from you, and sometimes that means people don't realise how much she really needs help herself."

Meredith remembered Arizona stroking Mark's hair, telling him stories about Sofia and Callie as she tried to get him to hang on a little longer, "she must've been in so much pain,"

"What?" April and Alex looked at her,

"When we were in the woods …" both of them looked at her, no one ever talked about what happened out there, "Mark was … dying … and his head was in her lap and she just talked him through those four days. She kept him awake and alive." Meredith paused, closing her eyes, "and then he died anyway, and she wasn't there." She brought a hand up to her face, shaking her head.

"Like Tim," Alex muttered, leaning against the wall, "and Nick," April added, rocking Harriet's carrier dejectedly. Meredith looked at them confused, "Her brother, and childhood best friend," April replied. Meredith was in shock, she knew there was a lot she didn't know about Arizona but this was more than she could've ever imagined she was missing.

"Ok so we don't tell Callie, what happens when she calls, when Sofia wants to talk to her mother?"

Alex answered, "We do what Arizona wants. Enough of this bullshit deciding what's best for other people, if this is gonna keep happening we might as well learn from it." They all fell silent once more before Meredith grinned sadly, "Seattle Grace Mercy Death".

Alex chuckled, "Seattle Grace Mercy Death… it always had a nice ring to it" April shook her head as she cooed at Harriet sleeping form. Meredith walked over to the desk and checked the only chart there, April looked up, "everything good?"

"Ya, ya, I just… don't know what to do with myself, I want to help but, we've done everything we physically can…", She kept scanning the chart as she brought her head to rest on her arm, leaning on the counter. Just as she did so, two police officers emerged from the elevators at the end of the hall, accompanied by bailey's tired form. The three friends perked up, April standing from her seat to come stand beside the other two.

"Meredith, Alex, April, this is Detective Reyes and Detective Sadler. I've filled them in on what you told me, they've sent a team to the scene, but they'd like witness statements and to speak with Arizona."

Alex spoke up, "Well she's sedated right now and ummm, I wasn't a witness so I'm gonna go wait for her to wake up." He started to walk away before coming back and adding, "you don't come in to that room until she says she's ready to talk." He turned on his heel.

As he gently opened the door to Arizona's room, he was met with terrified blue eyes. He gently closed the door behind him and sat on the couch just beside it, all the while keeping eye contact with eyes that were slowly changing from terror to sadness.

"You don't need to be here, I'm fine, I don't need a babysitter," Arizona curled into herself, already building her walls back up, embarrassed by what people had already seen. Alex chuckled and brought his legs up to stretch on the couch, "that's a load of bullshit and you know it. But if you want to lie to yourself, I'm here for me as much as I am for you. You really freaked me out there."

Arizona smiled a small smile at that. Nothing could get past Alex, she'd trained him well. She turned her head towards him, "You and me both". He looked at her, "We gonna talk about it?" his eyes drifted ever so briefly to her forearm before flitting back up to her face, which had fallen as quickly as it had smiled. She moved her bandaged arm under the blanket and looked away towards the window and outside, there was no hiding from Alex, "Nope".

"The police are here" Arizona flinched but didn't look around, Alex got the message, "They won't come in until you're ready."

"That means I have to be ready at some point."

"That would be helpful yes," Alex smiled at Arizona's head on way of dealing with her own insecurities, they'd both grown a lot since they'd met. She turned back to look at him, exhaustion written all over her face, "what if I'm not ready, not… not ever. What if I'm just done?" Alex bowed his head, overwhelmed by the sheer defeat in her voice. Still looking at the ground he spoke, "remember when you first got here? And we went to get organs and I got pissed at you for…"

"talking about rainbows and relationships and crap" Alex looked up at the interruption, smiling at the memory, "Ya, and you told me that's just what we do. We face the consequences and move on to the next challenge, because or else we'll just get buried in despair".

"So can't I just move on, why do I have to talk to the police?" She was almost negotiating with Alex at this point. He looked at her with a crooked smile, "Because you can't just take the organs and walk away and try not to think of the kid who just died. You have to put the organs in some other kid so he lives and everything isn't in vain." he paused as Arizona started getting the drift of his message, "you gotta deal with your shit Robbins, because it's getting to be a lot and it's not healthy." Arizona stared at him, this was the most direct anyone had ever been with her.

"Because I'm pretty sure you don't see the tiny coffins in your dreams anymore. It has to be pretty bad when dead kids isn't what haunts you." She nearly laughed at the inanity of it all. He smiled and she looked down at her arm,

"Alex, I can't remember all of it. I can't even … I don't know …"

"Doesn't matter, you tell them what you remember, there's no expectations from you Arizona, we're all supporting you, we go at your pace and by your lead." Alex knew the mistakes they'd made in the past and he didn't want any ambiguity now. Arizona reached her arm out,

"Ok then, help me sit up a little so I can talk to these people."


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I know it's been forever but for those still following this story, here's the new chapter I conjured up now that the semester is successfully over. Enjoy and don't forget to review! Thanks

"What is it exactly that you want me to say?" Meredith fidgeted in her chair in the large conference room. She stared earnestly at the two detectives sitting across from her, playing with her hands before ultimately putting them on the table between her and the detectives.

"Well," the older detective, Reyes, sighed, "we've already got a pretty good idea of the timeline and the scene from what doctors Kepner and Avery were able to tell us. We're looking into any insights you might have and we understand you rode in the ambulance with the victim,"

"Arizona"

"Yes, sorry, you rode in the ambulance with Arizona, did she say anything?" Meredith looked down at her hands, trying her best to remember every little detail about last night.

"She was really out of it in the ambulance, she just kept saying please and help us,"

"Us?" Sadler, the younger detective inquired, taking notes,

"Ya, no… she thought she was back four years ago, in the plane crash we were in together, I told you she was out of it,"

"She was in a plane crash?" Reyes looked up, noting what Meredith had said,

"Ya, it's actually how she lost her leg, and you know, became disabled," Meredith's hand wandered over to her forearm as she once again wondered how any human being could be deranged enough to do this. She looked back up into the detectives' weary eyes,

"We were lost in the woods for four days before we were rescued," she kept going, knowing if she stopped she'd never be able to get it all out, " I noticed her first, the light was out so it was dark but my car was right next to hers and when I unlocked my door, I thought I saw something …

Oh god is that an animal, Meredith thought to herself as she got closer to her car, noticing a dark shape behind it. She turned her flashlight on on her phone to get a better look. That's when she noticed just how much blood was staining the ground around the shape. She looked up and noticed the smashed window, the broken mirror and dented door of Arizona's car, Arizona who was supposed to have left hours ago.

"Guys" she called out to April and Jackson, "Guys!" she called out more hurriedly as she came parallel to the space between the two cars and laid eyes on Arizona's still form. She was frozen in shock. Arizona's face was swollen and bleeding, her arms were laid at weird angles, and her clothes were torn. Everything was soaked in blood, and water from the puddles on the ground from the ever present Seattle rain. Seeing Arizona like that, it temporarily took her out of Seattle to a place much more sinister, but she shook her head, looking to her right where Jackson was already on the phone with emergency responders.

She kneeled beside the blonde, taking inventory of her injuries as April started tying her scarf around Arizona's arm. She moved to take a pulse on Arizona's wrist and was startled when Arizona latched onto her, grabbing her hand with incredible force. Meredith looked up to meet Arizona's bright blue eyes, one of them nearly closed shut, the other filled with tears,

"please…" she struggled to get the rest of what she wanted to say out, as paramedics rushed toward her. She never let go of Meredith though and as they were in the ambulance riding back, she struggled to speak, "Callie … she'll … " Meredith leaned in, trying to make it easier for Arizona to speak, but already she was fading out of consciousness, "she's looking ... for us".

"That's it, that's all she said, after that everything you need to know is in the medical records." Meredith took a deep breath and let herself lean back into the chair. The detectives finished writing their notes, detective Sadler spoke up,

"Callie is … " Meredith interrupted, " Callie Torres, Arizona's ex-wife, she moved to New York with their daughter a few weeks ago."

"Any reason to suspect…" Sadler shifter uncomfortably in his seat, Meredith looked back at him confused before what he was asking dawned on her, "Of course not! Callie would never be able to do that, much less do it Arizona. Plus she's an orthopaedic surgeon and has the biggest heart, no there's absolutely no way." Meredith, infuriated, stared back at detective Sadler as he looked apologetically down at his notes. Reyes chimed in,

"Anyone you think might actually be capable, maybe an ex, a patient or a colleague?"

Meredith tried to think and realised she wasn't remotely close enough to Arizona to be able to answer that question, "She's perky…" Meredith muttered almost to herself, the detectives looked lost, "What?" Sadler asked.

Meredith looked up, not realising she'd spoken aloud, "Oh, she's perky, and happy and smiles at everyone, Arizona's not the type for enemies. I don't know her well enough though, for exes you'd have to ask April, or Richard Webber, but even then, she's private about that kind of stuff. After that... she's paediatrics so it's more likely a parent if that's the scenario you're thinking of, that and colleagues would be better answered by Alex Karev, the other Peds attending."

The detectives stood up from their chairs and Meredith did the same, opening the door as they walked through,

"Do you know how to get back to Arizona's room?"

Meredith smiled, "I can bring you back there but I don't know if Alex will let you back in,"

"The protective man from downstairs?" Reyes questioned as they started walking in the direction of Arizona's room; Meredith chuckled as she pressed the down button on the elevator.

—

"Just give me a few minutes Alex?" Arizona asked after he'd supplied her with a pillow and situated her in a comfortable seated position on the bed.

"Absolutely, I'll just be right outside," She smiled slightly as he left and closed the door behind him. She let out absolutely hated feeling helpless or vulnerable. She wasn't sure if she had even fully recovered from the last event that had rendered these feelings her default state, and now this. She brought her hand up to her face and she felt the swollen eye and cheek, the cut on her jaw, the bruising on her forehead. She looked at the bandage wrapped around the arm and felt the urge to vomit again but held it in. It was difficult not to undo the entirety of the progress she had made in three years, the mental and emotional hurdles she had overcome, when thinking about that one word, carved into her skin forever.

Her thoughts travelled back to the early days, in a bed just like this in the home she shared with Callie. She never thought then that she could even be left alone with Sofia, or be trusted to ever operate on a child. She never thought then, that she could lead a semblance of a normal life and just as she was starting to do just that, someone had to validate all her fears, all the insecurities she had pushed deep into her subconscious.

She continued to assess her injuries, desperate not to dwell on the scar that was burning through her skin. Her other forearm was wrapped, around her wrist, tightly. Probably sprained, from the look and feel of it, you didn't spend years with an ortho surgeon without learning a few things. She looked further, at the distinct curves of the blanket around her, one long and slender, the other short and abrupt. She stared at her residual limb intently, everything from loathing to terror to indifference racing through her mind, before she was interrupted by a knock at the door. She shifted in the bed a little, nervously picking at the blanket, "come in."

Meredith poked her head through the door, "the detectives are ready to talk when you are."

"I'm ready, they can come in." She took a breath as Meredith opened the door and let the detectives in. She looked at the two well dressed men who strode in, occupying the space at the end of the bed and trying to discreetly look her over. She glanced back at Meredith, her heart pounding into her chest. As she stared at Meredith, the other woman seemed to get the gist of Arizona's anxiety and stepped into the room, shutting the door behind her.

"I can stay in the room if you want," She moved to sit on the stool she had vacated a few hours ago and rested her arm on the bed beside Arizona. Arizona's eyes darted nervously around the room and she brought her hand up to play with the neck of her hospital gown as she tried to calm herself down.

"I umm …" she bit her lip and put her arm down before bringing it back up to her gown, "I don't really remember much, I can't … I don't have like a timeline or anything … I don't think …" she was staring at the window at this point, very much wishing she were anywhere but in that room. Detective Reyes, sensing her discomfort, stepped in gently,

"We're not expecting anything," he said, echoing Alex's earlier words, "all we want to know is what you can remember, there's no pressure, we have plenty of time." Arizona looked at his kind eyes and then back down to her lap, biting on her lip repeatedly as she tried to gather her thoughts into a coherent narrative.

"Do you have my prosthetic?" She turned her head toward Meredith who was caught off guard,

"What? Umm, no, I don't think… you didn't have it when we got to the hospital. It was pretty hectic in the parking lot but I don't remember anyone taking it off you or … no I didn't see it."

Arizona looked back up to the detectives in front of her, both of them looked confused, "No, the techs we sent to the parking lot didn't find anything other than your car, your purse, remnants of clothing and your keys…" Sadler answered, scrutinizing his phone for more.

"My purse is still there? But you can't find my prosthetic?" Everyone in the room was equally puzzled and Detective Sadler stepped quickly stepped outside, dialling the number for the crew that was still cataloguing evidence at the scene. As Sadler closed the door behind him, Reyes turned his attention back to a newly anxious Arizona.

"How about you start with the first thing you remember and from there, it doesn't have to be linear, just anything that you can tell us, we'll take," he smiled at her, taking his note pad out.

Arizona looked at the ceiling as she focused on last night, willing the tears not to come. She looked back down at her lap and took a breath,

"Ok, well, I left Joe's early because I was supposed to operate this morning … on a kid who's been waiting months … " Already she was breaking down, thinking about the operations and the children she was letting down at this very moment. She willed herself to continue, she kept speaking slowly, "umm, ya I walked to my car and it was really dark, the lights in that lot are always broken. I got to my car and went to open the door but I felt," she brought her hand up around her neck, "there was a hand on my neck and another one on the back of my head and he pushed me forward and my head hit the window"

"You're sure it was a man?" Reyes interrupted, Arizona sifted through her memories, flashes of darkness and red permeating her mind,

"Absolutely, he was … a lot taller, but I didn't see his face. His hands were too big and it just… I don't know, I know it was a man," she started biting her lip again and Reyes jotted more down,

"the hit on the door really messed me up, everything is a blur, I think I might've blacked out… I remember feeling his hand around my arm and just really intense pain, like penetrating … probably from the knife" she traced the wound on the arm gently, "and when I went to scream he punched me … I don't remember anything else." She swiped at a lone tear making it's way down her cheek as detective Sadler reentered the room.

As he made his way back to stand beside Reyes, he addressed Arizona, "they didn't find your prosthetic anywhere near the parking lot, it's not in any of the neighbouring alleys or streets either. We're going to have to work under the assumption that he took it." Sadler gave Reyes a meaningful look and Arizona's eyes darted between the two.

"Is there something I'm supposed to be understanding here?" She glanced down at Meredith, who's hand she had, at some point or another, ended up holding. Noticing the dejected look in her eyes, Arizona glanced back at the detectives, "what, what is it?"

Reyes sighed, "Well, from what we've been able to gather from friends regarding your character and your relationships combined with the missing prosthetic and the cut on your arm," Arizona brought her arm protectively against her chest, subconsciously trying to hide the scar, "we're pushed to think that this was a targeted attack on a specific disabled member of society…"

"And that if we don't catch him soon, you'll probably be the first of many in assaults the media will take joy in salaciously nicknaming" Sadler finished, sympathy radiating from both detectives.

Arizona closed her eyes, now more than ever, wishing she could just sink into the earth forever.


	5. Chapter 5

Arizona looked around her bedroom. This house was too big, she thought, too big for just one person. She could feel the emptiness pressing against her as she sat on the bed trying to muster up the energy to move.

They'd kept her the day at the hospital but none of her injuries required further intensive care so they'd had to discharge her. She could feel her ribs, her wrist and her forearm with acute pain, but to be honest her whole body felt like it had been thrown around in a particularly violent football game. She looked around and set her eyes on the bag on her bedside table.

Alex helped sneak her out of the hospital, although she couldn't imagine they would manage to keep this a secret for long, she appreciated the effort. He'd helped her upstairs and explained the contents of the bag he gingerly set down on the table before awkwardly making his exit.

A cream for her forearm and other lacerations and a collection of painkillers that would surely knock her right out. She sighed and reached for the crutches leaning against the bed, grabbing the bag in the process, she hobbled over to the bathroom and turned the knobs for the shower scalding hot. Leaving the bag on the counter, she peeled off her clothes. She tried desperately not to look at herself. She felt dirty, used almost. Although she couldn't make everything out, she did have a sense that his hands had left a lasting impression on her skin; she ran her palm over distinct nail scratches along her left thigh, where he would have had to pull to rid her of her prosthetic. She maneuvered herself into the shower, trying to situate herself on the shower bench in such a way that the wrap on her wrist wouldn't get wet, she didn't think she could rewrap it herself. Holding on to the bar on the wall on one side and the shower door on the other, she scooted backward until the water was cascading down her head and body. It burned, made her skin feel like it was on fire, but she didn't know what else to do, how else to get him off her.

That's when she let go. She'd cried the day before, but had stopped herself short when the embarrassment of Meredith being present settled in. Here, with the rush of water covering up the sound and the walls shielding her from the world's stare she lost it. Cried until she was gasping for air, clung to the wall like it was the only thing keeping her alive, screamed like she'd wanted to for years now. She couldn't understand the hand dealt to her. In just over five years, she'd been involved in a shooting, a car crash, a plane crash and now an assault. She'd lost her leg, She'd gotten married just to lose all hope for love, lost her childhood best friend, had a child only to lose her father, and at this point she didn't even have Sofia there. Everything seemed to have gone wrong and it didn't seem there was any air left, any space to exist.

She opened her eyes and gasped in a deep breath she hadn't realised she'd been holding. The water had gone cold. She looked at the tiles in front of her as the water continued to pound at her back. She noticed the bag left on the counter. Breathing shallowly she reminded herself of what she still had. She had Alex. She had April, someone who'd become an unexpected ally, something good that had happened in the last five years. She had friends, and supporters, people who genuinely cared for her no matter the shit the world threw at her. In that moment, that was enough for her take a breath a keep going. It was going to take so much more, but she couldn't sink into total despair yet, she had people.

She sat on the bed, in pyjamas that she'd spent a considerable time trying to put on, staring at the cream and pills in front of her. She moved her hand to the clasp for the gauze wrapped around her forearm, shaking at the thought of confronting the word on her arm. She couldn't do it. She collapsed back onto the mountain of pillows behind her, tears fighting to escape. She turned her head to the phone on the nightstand and grabbed it instead.

She dialled and held the phone up to her ear, half praying they wouldn't answer. She nervously picked at hem of her top, biting her lip as the phone rang for the fourth time. She made the move to hang up when she heard a groggy voice come through.

"Hello? Arizona? It's eleven and I work mornings on Thursdays you know that"

Shit, she hadn't thought of the time difference, Arizona seriously considered just hanging up right then and there, but she couldn't do it.

"…Callie…" her voice wavered as she tried to keep it together.

"Arizona?" Callie's tone had gone from irritated to concerned, "is something wrong? Did something happen?"

"Ummm… I wanted … I wanted you to hear it from me and I don't know how long we can keep it quiet and I was about to take one of the pills and I realised I don't know how long I'll be out for and Sofia…" Arizona had completely lost her train of thought as tears fell freely down her face. On the other side of the call, Callie was thoroughly confused,

"What are talking about Arizona, what pills, what secret? What happened?" Arizona could hear her moving around, clearly not sleepy anymore. Arizona took a deep breath, trying to scramble together how to announce to her ex wife that she'd been attacked. She hadn't thought this through and once again she considered hanging up,

"Arizona please," Callie's soft tone pleaded with her through the phone, Arizona broke,

"Last night," Arizona stared at the blanket, picking lint off of it, "I was walking back to my car from Joe's and ummm…" she brought a hand up to her face, leaning into it, "a man attacked me." her voice cracked and from the other end, she heard Callie draw in a breath. She picked up at super speed,

"I'm fine really, just a few cracked ribs, a sprained wrist, bruises and lacerations. He took my prosthetic, the police think I was targeted for it, but I'm fine honestly. I'm just calling because I don't know how much time I'll be able to make for Sofia and I don't exactly look um, presentable right now and I was hoping to talk to her but I guess it's late, I'll call back um…"

"Arizona," Callie's soft voice interrupted her, "Ya" Arizona's voice cracked as she answered through tears.

"Did you shower?" Arizona took a breath, her body visibly calming from its tense position, "Ya".

"And you have your other prosthetic in the closet?", "Ya".

"And you're safe, in bed?" Callie continued, the softness of her voice carrying over to Arizona,

"Ya I am."

"Everything is ok. I'll tell Sofia that you won't be able to talk for a little while and you can tell her when you're ready." Arizona sighed and closed her eyes briefly before replying,

"Thank you, Callie." Callie smiled and sat down on her couch,

"Thank you, Arizona. For calling me, it means a lot. I … I know how hard this has to be." she took a breath, "boy aren't you the unluckiest person alive?"

Arizona actually laughed, and Callie smiled again, an awkward silence filled the air as they tried to feel out the conversation, figuring out what they were to each other in this moment. Callie was the person who knew most what Arizona was going through right at that moment, but they barely had a relationship of any kind right now. The sad tension surrounded them both,

"You really are doing ok though?" Arizona considered the question, looking down at her bandaged forearm,

"I have people." She breathed deeply, "Alex, April, Bailey, even Meredith. I've got people, if I've learned anything from last time, it's that I can't stay stuck in one place. I've gotta do something… I think I'm gonna umm… I'm gonna find a therapist… to" she gulped at the thought, "to deal with my shit, as Alex put it."

Callie couldn't believe what she was hearing. It filled her with a certain pride to hear that Arizona was finally willingly seeking help. She'd watched this incredible woman go through hell and she knew her better than anyone and Arizona was a very proud person. Which is why there was also a bit of sadness, that this had finally broken her, that she'd realised to what extent the world had beaten her up. Callie shook her head,

"I know how much is going into that decision Arizona, and I'm not gonna tell you I'm proud because I can just feel you pulling away at what you think is me being patronizing" Arizona rolled her eyes but smiled a little, "but I do understand just what this decision means and I think it's incredible, you're incredible. And you've been through so much, you deserve better and this absolutely the first step."


End file.
